What a lovely article about lying and how children in general deal with understanding lying.
http://notjustcute.com/2013/02/05/time-for-the-truth-what-does-it-really-mean-when-kids-lie/
Friday, August 22, 2014
Tuesday, September 17, 2013
Understanding the Basics of Sensory Integration
I watched this video the other day and found it to be very insightful. This is an Occupational Therapist explaining sensory integration and modulation - very important components to understanding our kid's behaviors and perceptions. Enjoy!
Tuesday, August 27, 2013
Monday, August 26, 2013
Meet and Expand
I was reading in "Engaging Autism" today (a spectacular book... I recommend everyone read it), and I came across this quote:
1. We forget to determine or are unable to determine where their level of existing abilities currently are.
How easy it can be to forget to really determine a child's existing ability. We look at their peers and think, "they should be like that." Or, we look at their age and think, "This is what they should be doing." Or, we look at our expectations and think, "I want them to be doing this." But, how important is it to get reality in a child's baseline. Yes, sometimes it hurts as a parent or teacher to face it. But, without starting where they're at, they'll never get where we want them to go. This is also usually most effective if done in a team. Ask parents. Ask others who have worked with them. Ask professionals that might be able to help. Read about what stages a child goes through to develop to something. Pray. All of these things help to get an accurate picture of where a child really is... and therefore what you can expect of them and where you can start with them.
2. We move too fast and expand expansion to be immediate and not gradual.
Development is HARD. It can be LONG. It can be EXHAUSTING. Although kids are very fast learners, that doesn't mean a child will develop a skill overnight. Just today I was working with a parent who said to me, "We've been working on this the whole summer (three whole months!) and he hasn't gotten ANYWHERE!" First, he has. But, you forgot to look at and remember his baseline. You're not giving him credit for where he's been compared to where he is now. Secondly, three months? You get up everyday and run 3 miles... every. single. day.... and then tell me how you feel in three months? You may be hitting your goals a little more, but it takes WAY longer than 3 months for the skills, muscles, endurance and mastery to appear. See the little steps. And have patience. Each step is gradual. Each skill is built on a slow foundation that will be able to hold up further learning. Enjoy the journey and don't forget to see the gradual incline for what it is - WONDERFUL improvement!
3. We lack creativity in expansion and expect rigid and predictable changes.
So, we know where a child's at and we know it's probably gonna take more than overnight to get there. Where's the FUN!? If you're feeling like your child is stuck, you're not having enough fun! Sure, you may do the same thing a BILLION times... so find a way to creatively change the flavor of it. For example, a client of mine was obsessed with camping. He wanted to play camping all the time - he would put up a tent and they would pretend to cook over the fire and sleep in sleeping bags, etc. Apparently this was happening incessantly and there was no other forms of play. So, we started where that child was at. His mother said, "I think pretend play is hard for him, so he finds ways to make it safe. That's why he likes camping - he can make a safe little tent." I thought about that for a moment and I realized that if we were gonna start where he was at, we had to start where he was safe - with a tent. Okay, so... how are we going to expand this pretend play and yet still keep the tent? After a bit of brainstorming together, we came up with a whole list: Make a space shuttle out of the tent, make a cave out of the tent, make an umbrella house out of the tent, make a dog kennel out of the tent, make an underwater aquarium out of the tent.... you see where I'm going with this. Suddenly, with a little more creativity, we were able to expand on what was already working for him and his pretend play became more imaginative, with more language and more cooperation. Space turned out to be just as fun (and just as safe) as camping.
So, friends, keep the creative juices flowing! Turn your brain loose! Get out of the box and think about things differently than you ever have before. The more you practice this, the better you will get and the easier you will be able to support your kiddo.
Anyway, just a few words from the moon, where I flew with a beautiful little friend of mine today in his brand new space shuttle tent :) Happy day!
"The key to expanding children's ability to be secure, calm, and regulated in the shared world is to meet them first at the level of their existing abilities and then gradually expand out from that base of security." -p. 75I thought it was a lovely quote and a great reminder. While working with a child and his wonderful Mom today, I found that there were three common problems I see among adults working with children and trying to expand their abilities:
1. We forget to determine or are unable to determine where their level of existing abilities currently are.
How easy it can be to forget to really determine a child's existing ability. We look at their peers and think, "they should be like that." Or, we look at their age and think, "This is what they should be doing." Or, we look at our expectations and think, "I want them to be doing this." But, how important is it to get reality in a child's baseline. Yes, sometimes it hurts as a parent or teacher to face it. But, without starting where they're at, they'll never get where we want them to go. This is also usually most effective if done in a team. Ask parents. Ask others who have worked with them. Ask professionals that might be able to help. Read about what stages a child goes through to develop to something. Pray. All of these things help to get an accurate picture of where a child really is... and therefore what you can expect of them and where you can start with them.
2. We move too fast and expand expansion to be immediate and not gradual.
Development is HARD. It can be LONG. It can be EXHAUSTING. Although kids are very fast learners, that doesn't mean a child will develop a skill overnight. Just today I was working with a parent who said to me, "We've been working on this the whole summer (three whole months!) and he hasn't gotten ANYWHERE!" First, he has. But, you forgot to look at and remember his baseline. You're not giving him credit for where he's been compared to where he is now. Secondly, three months? You get up everyday and run 3 miles... every. single. day.... and then tell me how you feel in three months? You may be hitting your goals a little more, but it takes WAY longer than 3 months for the skills, muscles, endurance and mastery to appear. See the little steps. And have patience. Each step is gradual. Each skill is built on a slow foundation that will be able to hold up further learning. Enjoy the journey and don't forget to see the gradual incline for what it is - WONDERFUL improvement!
3. We lack creativity in expansion and expect rigid and predictable changes.
So, we know where a child's at and we know it's probably gonna take more than overnight to get there. Where's the FUN!? If you're feeling like your child is stuck, you're not having enough fun! Sure, you may do the same thing a BILLION times... so find a way to creatively change the flavor of it. For example, a client of mine was obsessed with camping. He wanted to play camping all the time - he would put up a tent and they would pretend to cook over the fire and sleep in sleeping bags, etc. Apparently this was happening incessantly and there was no other forms of play. So, we started where that child was at. His mother said, "I think pretend play is hard for him, so he finds ways to make it safe. That's why he likes camping - he can make a safe little tent." I thought about that for a moment and I realized that if we were gonna start where he was at, we had to start where he was safe - with a tent. Okay, so... how are we going to expand this pretend play and yet still keep the tent? After a bit of brainstorming together, we came up with a whole list: Make a space shuttle out of the tent, make a cave out of the tent, make an umbrella house out of the tent, make a dog kennel out of the tent, make an underwater aquarium out of the tent.... you see where I'm going with this. Suddenly, with a little more creativity, we were able to expand on what was already working for him and his pretend play became more imaginative, with more language and more cooperation. Space turned out to be just as fun (and just as safe) as camping.
So, friends, keep the creative juices flowing! Turn your brain loose! Get out of the box and think about things differently than you ever have before. The more you practice this, the better you will get and the easier you will be able to support your kiddo.
Anyway, just a few words from the moon, where I flew with a beautiful little friend of mine today in his brand new space shuttle tent :) Happy day!
Tuesday, August 13, 2013
Ministering on the Spectrum
A friend sent me this beautiful article outlining things we can do specifically as Primary teachers working with kids with autism. I recommend this read to anyone wondering what to do and how to approach an individualized teaching plan for a child with disabilities - specifically autism.
http://bycommonconsent.com/2013/07/25/ministering-on-the-spectrum/
My favorite quote from it:
http://bycommonconsent.com/2013/07/25/ministering-on-the-spectrum/
My favorite quote from it:
"It’s important for instructors in the group environment during Sharing Time and in the smaller classes to be on the same page with understanding the individual child, and with a plan of how to manage the child’s needs, while still respecting the needs of the other children and rules of the classroom.
The starting place with this understanding always begins with the parent(s).
The first call a Primary Presidency should make is to ask the parent(s) to tell them about their child. The parent(s) will be able to easily and most accurately convey the strengths and the possible trouble areas for the child."
Thursday, January 24, 2013
Teaching Large Group Primary
I went to Primary with a beautiful little boy I know the other day. And I was struck by a few thoughts that I figured I would jot down here and see if it would help. This Primary I went to was wonderful to watch. There were a few beautiful things they did that helped support children when they were all together as a large group. As I watched, I found that the teachers who followed these tips not only had this little boy on my lap TOTALLY sucked in and engaged, but they had me singing and smiling, too. So, teachers of ALL children, but especially those with developmental disabilities (autism, asperger's, ADHD, etc.), here's some things to consider:
Watch Your Visuals:
Every child needs visuals. They need something that they can see that will support what you are trying to tell them. Language is still a new concept for most of our kids - even those in the senior Primary! They've only been talking for a couple years and we have to remember that most of the time we probably don't make the slightest sense to them. By adding visuals, we can REALLY support understanding as well as add an element of organization and intrigue.
Your visuals need to be clear. They need to make sense. Visuals that are too small, too busy, too complicated won't help, but hinder. Kids need visuals that are so clear they could explain to you what they mean. They need to be organized and thoughtful. Think simple and effective. For example: At this Primary I went to, one of the teachers stood up in front of the classroom. She had one of those Book of Mormon comic-strip type of books (like these: Comic Strip Book). She held it up and read a page from the book. Although these books are wonderful when sitting in a small group, they were extremely difficult to see or understand when standing in front of the whole Primary. Sure, she was using a visual, but only the front row could see. Even if the pictures were bigger, they are full of detail and very complex. For a child who struggles to focus on the big picture thinking, presenting a complex picture might be difficult for teaching to a concept. There's just too many tangents a child could visually take.
Contrast that with the music teacher who stood up and used visuals similar to this (see "Do As I'm Doing" Cards on this website): http://sunbeamsinging.wordpress.com/2012/12/29/introducing-i-am-a-child-of-god/
Notice how clear their message is. The idea is simple and using these visuals will really support what it is you want a child to do or understand from what you are saying (or singing). If these are large so the whole primary can see them, even better. You have to imagine being in the back seat with all the bouncy kids and chatting teachers in front of you - then consider your visuals and if they will still catch the attention of that kid.
Slow Down Your Words:
Are you spilling words out of your mouth at a million miles a minute? Or are you slowing your voice down, increasing your facial expressions and dramatic expression in a way that is enticing and exciting? Instead of saying, "now boys and girls I want you to sit down and then listen to this song and then after that we will use some sign language to try and sing it together," can you say in a sing songy voice with a BIG, BRIGHT face, "Liiiiiiiisten. I hear a song. Do you?" Pause. Act mysterious. The put your hand to your ear and encourage the kids to do the same while you listen to the song. "Now. Ooooopen your eyes. Can you SEE me sing this song?" Open your eyes wide with wonder. Then do it with signs. Then say, "Can YOU sing this song with words and hands?" Dramatically do it together, slowly, so the kids can be successful. The pianist in this Primary really slowed the songs down which helped tremendously in adding meaning and success for these kids.
Read Your Student's Cues:
At this Primary I was at, there was a brand new little girl. She was soooooo excited to be in this Primary. She was trying to answer every question and had an exuberance that was almost overwhelming. But, what I did notice was that she rose her hand EVERY time before yelling out. And EVERY time, the teacher ignored her. So, then she yelled out whatever it was she was going to say until someone had to say, "shhhhh! Raise your hand." But this poor little girl WOULD raise her hand and no one would care or pay attention.
However, a teacher a little bit later would notice her hand and she would wink at her and sign "wait" with her fingers while mouthing it so she could see. This little girl, although exploding in anticipation, would wait because someone noticed her. She would slap her hand over her mouth and hold it in because she knew that EVERY time she would get to say her answer. Sometimes she didn't get to answer it to everyone. The teacher would say, "on the count of three, whisper your answer," and all kids would answer. Or she'd say, "if you know the answer, tell your neighbor." By reading this particular child's specific cues, this teacher was able to support her by giving her the extra attention she needed and as a result, she had more engagement from ALL kids and less disruption from this child because she found a way to functionally allow her to express herself in ways that worked.
Anyway, these are simple ideas that we all know, but I thought I'd just throw them out there again after watching this beautiful Primary with such talented teachers. Enjoy!
Watch Your Visuals:
Every child needs visuals. They need something that they can see that will support what you are trying to tell them. Language is still a new concept for most of our kids - even those in the senior Primary! They've only been talking for a couple years and we have to remember that most of the time we probably don't make the slightest sense to them. By adding visuals, we can REALLY support understanding as well as add an element of organization and intrigue.
Your visuals need to be clear. They need to make sense. Visuals that are too small, too busy, too complicated won't help, but hinder. Kids need visuals that are so clear they could explain to you what they mean. They need to be organized and thoughtful. Think simple and effective. For example: At this Primary I went to, one of the teachers stood up in front of the classroom. She had one of those Book of Mormon comic-strip type of books (like these: Comic Strip Book). She held it up and read a page from the book. Although these books are wonderful when sitting in a small group, they were extremely difficult to see or understand when standing in front of the whole Primary. Sure, she was using a visual, but only the front row could see. Even if the pictures were bigger, they are full of detail and very complex. For a child who struggles to focus on the big picture thinking, presenting a complex picture might be difficult for teaching to a concept. There's just too many tangents a child could visually take.
Contrast that with the music teacher who stood up and used visuals similar to this (see "Do As I'm Doing" Cards on this website): http://sunbeamsinging.wordpress.com/2012/12/29/introducing-i-am-a-child-of-god/
Notice how clear their message is. The idea is simple and using these visuals will really support what it is you want a child to do or understand from what you are saying (or singing). If these are large so the whole primary can see them, even better. You have to imagine being in the back seat with all the bouncy kids and chatting teachers in front of you - then consider your visuals and if they will still catch the attention of that kid.
Are you spilling words out of your mouth at a million miles a minute? Or are you slowing your voice down, increasing your facial expressions and dramatic expression in a way that is enticing and exciting? Instead of saying, "now boys and girls I want you to sit down and then listen to this song and then after that we will use some sign language to try and sing it together," can you say in a sing songy voice with a BIG, BRIGHT face, "Liiiiiiiisten. I hear a song. Do you?" Pause. Act mysterious. The put your hand to your ear and encourage the kids to do the same while you listen to the song. "Now. Ooooopen your eyes. Can you SEE me sing this song?" Open your eyes wide with wonder. Then do it with signs. Then say, "Can YOU sing this song with words and hands?" Dramatically do it together, slowly, so the kids can be successful. The pianist in this Primary really slowed the songs down which helped tremendously in adding meaning and success for these kids.
Read Your Student's Cues:
At this Primary I was at, there was a brand new little girl. She was soooooo excited to be in this Primary. She was trying to answer every question and had an exuberance that was almost overwhelming. But, what I did notice was that she rose her hand EVERY time before yelling out. And EVERY time, the teacher ignored her. So, then she yelled out whatever it was she was going to say until someone had to say, "shhhhh! Raise your hand." But this poor little girl WOULD raise her hand and no one would care or pay attention.
However, a teacher a little bit later would notice her hand and she would wink at her and sign "wait" with her fingers while mouthing it so she could see. This little girl, although exploding in anticipation, would wait because someone noticed her. She would slap her hand over her mouth and hold it in because she knew that EVERY time she would get to say her answer. Sometimes she didn't get to answer it to everyone. The teacher would say, "on the count of three, whisper your answer," and all kids would answer. Or she'd say, "if you know the answer, tell your neighbor." By reading this particular child's specific cues, this teacher was able to support her by giving her the extra attention she needed and as a result, she had more engagement from ALL kids and less disruption from this child because she found a way to functionally allow her to express herself in ways that worked.
Anyway, these are simple ideas that we all know, but I thought I'd just throw them out there again after watching this beautiful Primary with such talented teachers. Enjoy!
Wednesday, January 23, 2013
Living with Autism
For those of you who may have just had a child diagnosed with autism or with any other challenge - I recommend you watch this beautiful video. This is compiled by Clear Horizons Academy - a school for children with ASD and other learning difference in Orem, Utah - as well as the Autism Resources of Utah County Group and the Autism Council of Utah. I know many of these families and have seen their battles. They are strong and lovely and I gain such courage and strength from simply interacting with them. I think we would all be well to follow their advice and take their words to heart. Enjoy!
If you would like to know more about Clear Horizons Academy or have access to their free training and resources, please visit: clearhorizonsacademy.org.
If you would like to know more about Clear Horizons Academy or have access to their free training and resources, please visit: clearhorizonsacademy.org.
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